Growing into The Mommy Life

A couple of weeks ago I ran into a former acquaintance from FC and while we were talking, she paused and asked me, "So, tell me, do you love being a mom?" and for the first time in a while I didn't hesitate to say, "Yes, I do!" I still have problems admitting that at times; there's an internal fight with the Megan of yesteryear and the Megan that I am today.  You see, it wasn't so long ago I didn't think mothering would be in the cards for me...

When I look back at my youth, I sometimes think I thought too much and I thought about all the things moms "have" to do, and to be honest, I looked at my own mom's life and thought, "Wow, everyday, it's the same thing." Not that my mom didn't do it joyfully, because to be honest, I never really saw her complain.  But it was up in the morning, getting the kids going, cleaning up the kitchen, doing laundry, paying bills, running errands, shuffling kids (I guess since we were all spaced out it wasn't always all 4 of us at once!), making dinner, cleaning the kitchen again and if she was lucky, sitting down for a minute.  As a feeble-minded youth, I just didn't see the fun in it.  And of course, I was selfish. More of self, and less of Thee.  I was immature.

And then (I know I talk about it frequently but to blog is semi-therapeutic and I'm constantly reevaluating this, since it's been the biggest catalyst in my life for change), after I realized there are a few good men out there--aside from family members and good-friends-who-were-boys that I just couldn't fathom settling down with--and Providence landed me with Greg, I figured we had a few more years before the childbearing began.  Hahahahahahaha.  God really laughed at that plan, just as he laughed at my plan to finish my grad school internship right after we got married so that we would only be a single-income family for about one college semester.  Looking back I figured there was a purpose for that setback, to not be in school full-time, or not be interning, or not be earning any real money.  I didn't know when I'd realize it or when I'd figure it out and I still don't know if I fully understand it all, but it taught me one thing.  My timing isn't always God's timing, even if it stinks.
Of course, when I did finally graduate, and got a job, and then almost immediately got pregnant, I think I really felt out-of-control.  The best laid plans oft go awry.  Could that not be a life statement for most of us??

When we lose our locus-of-control, often our "happiness" or internal contentment diminishes.  And this is what I think about often.  I didn't immediately enjoy motherhood because I wasn't prepared for it. I didn't think it was in the cards in the short-term future.  I was not in control.  I was not willing to accept what I thought I'd be giving up.  And do you know how hard that is to admit?  Aren't young Christian women supposed to yearn for the call of motherhood? Is it considered selfish to not desire that role instinctively or immediately?  Well at least for me, those instincts hadn't kicked on just yet.  It had nothing to do with my own mom or other mothers around me, yet I felt guilty for feeling that way, like I was offending their being.  Before we got married and talked about kids, I figured the desire to be a mom would grow the longer we were married.

And in the middle of all that, Mia was born, and her birth was great, really really great.  There's not a single thing I would change about that.  When I reflect on it, it was such a serene, peaceful and beautiful day when my world was literally rocked.  The day I became a mother.
But I can't change what all happened after that.  It was rough. Really really rough.  And having Gabe's birth experience and the days thereafter to compare with Mia's, I realize just how different things could have been, but weren't. I realize now why I wasn't immediately happy as a new mom.  I unfortunately had some lingering baby blues.  So, when you're asked that infamous question, "Don't you loooove being a mom?", I almost resented it.  How could you ask me that??  It hurt.  She's small. I feel guilty.  I can't figure out this breastfeeding thing. I feel guilty. I keep getting sick. Why won't I get better? And I have a blood clot. What's wrong with me?  Pounding. Pounding. Pounding.

It gave me little chance to bond with a tiny, precious baby girl who is growing up into a delightful, strong child.  And I just didn't know how to be.
Finally, though, I got back some sense of control.  I found some purpose and I found some structure.  I found a community, and God gave me a group of people with whom I could work along side and feel productive. I felt useful, even if I was in a totally different role than I'd planned.  And to this day, it is still a little embarrassing to admit all those feelings that I had, but as a former counselor, I know you need to honor those feelings, or at least let them pass through, many times in order to move on.  You don't have to act on the feelings and actually BE selfish toward your child, or drop your responsibilities and walk away, but you can acknowledge them, have your peace, and move on.  And that's what I'm doing. Which is why I think I am enjoying the mommy life.  It is the toughest, highest calling I've ever known.  But these two munchkins are my arrows that will eventually be getting ready to launch, and just as God does a work in me, I have a work to do in them.

Let me do right by them. 

Gabe's Birth Story, Part II

If you missed Part I of Gabe's Birth Story, click here.

[Disclaimer: If you're a dude, one of my brothers, or generally uninterested in the minute details of a woman's real, live, all-natural birth, then you may want to skip this one!  All you need to know is posted at the end of this story (which means you'll have to skim through it and see totally safe pictures anyway). /End disclaimer.]

So, where did we leave off last?  Oh yes, that's right...we were beginning the drive down to TGH.

Since it was midday, traffic was slim to nil and we cruised down the interstate and took the Crosstown to get on over to the hospital. Dealing with contractions in the car is never fun, but it's part of the ballgame so I just rolled with it as much as I could.  As soon as we got to the hospital and began the valet parking experience, I started contracting again. I'm sure the valet men see it all the time: women trying to exit their cars only to find themselves stalled in an unusual standing position, working through a contraction.  Yes, that was me.

The next little bit was sort of a blur to me, as I just wanted to get all the business of triage behind me and focus on the rest of my labor, but I was taken by wheelchair to triage, with Greg and Stephanie, our doula, aside us, where we began the triage process. A nurse came in and checked me and said I was between 4-5 cm and almost completely effaced (was it 75%?).  On my chart she put a 5 and they admitted me.  We were able to get a room with a birth tub, which also happened to be overlooking the bay and as far as labor and delivery rooms go, it was pretty nice! Very scenic.  Not that I spent much time looking over the waters and considering the deep abyss that lies below, though.
Once we were admitted in the room, the doctor for the day stopped by and shared his greetings and went over the plan: I would labor for a few hours and then he would come check me again and see how things were progressing.  And if they weren't progressing, we'd talk about what to do next.  That little addition at the end was slightly worrisome as I didn't want to consider that there could possibly be any other options than this baby exiting my body the way nature intends but I didn't really let my mind go there. I just said okay and worked through more contractions.  For some reason unbeknownst to me, while we were in our room, a couple of nurses had to go through this laundry list of questions that were really irksome to me to have to answer.  Why these questions, why now?? Fortunately, Greg answered most of them and I just tried to get as comfy as I could while I waited for them to leave.
While they were wrapping up, my doula rubbed some labor oil and another aromatherapy blend on my belly (which she also had done before we left the house, and did a couple more times during labor) asked if I was ready to get into the birth tub. That sounded really good right about then, so I said yes and Greg, Stephanie and I made our way into the bathroom (sounds funny in retrospect) and with a little assistance I got into the tub.

Ahhhh....immediate relaxation.  Well, as much as one can relax in labor.  Something about laboring in water is quite soothing and chillaxing, and by that point (the rush of the morning, getting to the hospital, being triaged, being asked silly questions), I was ready for things to calm down a bit. Sometimes getting in the tub stalls labor for some women; I learned that at the birth center, but I was okay with a little stalling if I meant I could have some time to breathe and get a grip on things again.
I spent a good while in the tub--at least an hour--working and breathing through contractions, and telling myself to let the baby down and out when I was working through a tough one. I tried to visualize each contraction doing something purposeful--moving the baby down--so that I wouldn't fight it.  My doula played some music on her phone (New Age Essentials on Pandora if you're looking for some good birthin' music!) and turned off the lights so that it was very peaceful.  She and Greg just kind of observed while this happened and were there to provide support or chat with if I felt like it. But I can tell you from 2 birth experiences now, I rarely feel like chatting during labor!

There came a point when I felt it was time to get out, so I got out of the tub and sat on the toilet -- almost the exact same sequence I had in Mia's labor -- for a while to see how things felt out of the water.  And it was more intense.  I sat there for a few minutes until I heard that the doctor would be coming back in soon to check on me.  I couldn't believe it had already been a few hours, but it was and I gradually made my way out of the bathroom and to the bed. I must pause here and say my nurse was amazing. She stayed totally out of the way, and when she needed to check the baby on the monitor every so often, she wheeled the machine as close to the bathroom door as possible and strung out the cord as much as it would stretch so she could place it on my abdomen without my having to move hardly an inch!  She was very accommodating.  I also only had a heplock on my arm so that I could move around without being attached to a pole--that was all by request, too.

I was waiting for the doctor to come in and my contractions felt less and less tolerable.  I was getting antsy and kind of annoyed he wasn't there yet.  I thought he was coming; I got out of the bathroom and out of my zone to be checked and here I am uncomfortable just waiting on this bed!! Where's he at?


Finally he arrived, checked me, and said I was at 8cm.  Eight centimeters? Only eight? To be honest I was a little disappointed. For all that time I had spent laboring and knowing my labor with Mia lasted about 12 hours total, I was fully expecting this show to almost be done.  He said my bag of waters was still intact and at this point there were 2 options: break my bag of waters and we'd probably see a faster arrival of the baby, or wait it out and let my body do it on its own, which would probably take longer.

I asked him if we could briefly discuss it, so I spoke with Greg and my doula and I told them, "I'm ready for this to be over; maybe we should just break it?" and my doula agreed that at this point, it wasn't as risky an intervention, as normally I would not necessarily accept an artificial rupture of the membranes (to learn more, read here). In my case, since we were so close to the end, it can help speed dilation. We called him back in and said we would break it, so he scrubbed up and got the items he needed to do that and it broke. Being graphic here--it felt like a really really warm gush of water flowing out of me, almost a relief, followed by a very strong, intense and mighty contraction.  That contraction about sent me over the edge and I was ready to jump out of my own body and off that delivery table.  I felt that little baby's body come down strong and I felt an urge.  My nurse checked me after the next contraction and said I was fully dilated and complete and she called the doctor back in.  He had originally come in the room just after 4:30, broken my bag of waters some minutes after that, and was supposed to be off-shift at 5pm, but when he heard that I was complete and ready to push he came back in, got his delivery scrubs on, moved the bed a bit, changed the lighting, and called the newborn baby nurse.  This is when things got REAL and I was still in shock that this was really happening.

I remember Greg and Stephanie looking at me excitedly.  "This is it! We're about to push this baby out and meet him!" I'm sure that's what their faces meant.  In my head though, I was still thinking, How are we gonna do this? Do I remember how to do this? What if I have one of those agonizingly long pushing phases that lasts hours upon hours? Dare I say I watched a few too many birth shows this time around and despite pushing Mia out in probably 30 minutes, I just did not know if I would be so lucky this time.  The nurse and my doula helped me get my legs into position, and Greg was back by my head encouraging me through the process.
I will say that at the first pushing contraction, I pushed like a newbie. I'm embarrassed to say I screamed a bit and my nurse had to lovingly get in my face and tell me not to scream and that I needed to use my legs more for leverage and focus on where I was putting my energy in pushing so that it was most effective.

During the next contraction or two I started to figure it out and pushed as much as I could using all the coaching I was getting. I was following my own body's cues as well as the feedback from the whole delivery team.  Let me just tell you it is hard to push a baby out!  Our bodies were designed to do this, I truly believe, but getting the baby through that birth canal ain't necessarily always an easy business.  Once I started focusing on the task at hand, the process really worked itself out.  I'm still amazed at how short a time it took for the baby to work his way down and out.  With lots of excitement and positive feedback from the nurse, our doula, and Greg, after another contraction he was crowning, and by the next contraction he slithered his way out and was HERE!  All in all, it probably only took 10-15 minutes with probably 4 pushing contractions for Gabe to be born. I was
lucky
blessed!

They immediately placed the baby (who had to be named) on my abdomen with a towel and we gently scrubbed him off a little while he lay there. He was very calm and content as much as I can remember, and all I felt after he was born was this feeling of sheer relief and shock--much as I did with Mia--that this labor was OVER!  I was so thankful and Greg said I kept on saying, "Thank goodness, thank goodness, thank goodness!" as soon as he was delivered.  It's incredible how you go from one extreme while you're pushing (please let us be done with this business soon!) to incredible joy and pride as soon as the baby arrives.

first moments with mommy

happily posing with our newest addition

If you're a male reading this and get queasy easily then skip this paragraph...the placenta very quickly was delivered after that, and was a healthy red color, much different than Mia's.  What a relief to see it in such better condition and not to have to stand up and squat to deliver it like I did with Mia. Not fun!

The medical team really respected our wishes that the baby and I be skin-to-skin for the first hour, and let us bond and just chill while he and I were both checked out post-delivery.  I finally got a good look at him after the doctor left and realized he looked like a Gabe to me, which is the name we were both leaning towards the entire pregnancy.  Greg agreed and so we chose the name Gabriel Charles.  Gabriel is a Hebrew name, which means "God is my strength," and is the angel in the bible who told Mary she would be Jesus' earthly mother.  Charles is Greg's middle name and his maternal grandfather's name.  So, like Mia, Gabe has a family name, a biblical name, and his initials match Greg's like Mia's match mine!

hat crocheted by our doula

just after his newborn assessment

After the first hour, Gabe was given his newborn bath and assessment and we found out he was 6 pounds, 2.5 ounces and 19 inches long.  I was pretty jazzed to have broken the 6 pound mark, which was my "goal" this time around.  For the next little bit, we just hung out as a family and waited for Mia to arrive with Aunt Allison and Aunt Amanda, and Gabe just cuddled up with his while he was swaddled.

first family of 4 photo

About two hours later, we were transferred to our recovery room in a different area of the hospital and got to hang out as a whole family for a while before Mia went back home with Aunt Allison.

She quickly got accustomed to him, even though in this picture she clearly seems more interested in the Burt's Bees chapstick than she is of her little brother.  Right away she was trying to share items with him and she wanted to see his hands and his feet.  It didn't take her long at all to assume the big sister role.  

To "evaluate" the hospital birth as compared to the birth center birth, Greg and I were really pleased.  Our entire medical staff was very accommodating and respectful of our wishes. Our nurse was jazzed we were going all-natural.  There were never any tense heated moments or disagreements about our intentions or our wishes.  Everything was respected, even letting the cord pulse a little bit longer than may be usual before it was clamped and cut.  I later found out Greg accidentally left the birth plan in the car (oops!!) so he had whispered all our requests and preferences to the nurse during that "annoying" question and answer period when we first taken to the delivery room.  

I can safely say as much as we were able, we almost had a birth-center like birth at the hospital.  There are a few things that are impossible to compare, like the clinical nature of the hospital to the home-like nature of the birth center, or working with a midwife versus a doctor, but as far my actual labor & delivery experiences goes, I felt respected, heard and validated.  Which makes it sound like it's all about me, but I know from enough research, women can have feelings that linger for years regarding the birth experience they didn't get.  All of that was important to me, and for my feelings about my baby, and I'm very thankful our prayers were answered.  

So really, if you made it this far, or if you're just skimming the story, all you really need to know is, thanks to God, Gabriel was delivered safe and sound. Sigh.Of.Relief!

Gabe's birth story, part I

Waiting for [Gabe] was like knowing something was coming but being in denial it could happen at any minute. While I told myself, this could be it, he could be here before we know it, the day he arrived I was still in some shock until it was really happening.

I had lunch with two of my best gal pals earlier in the week (the first week of November, that is, right after Halloween), and discussed how his arrival would ideally come after the first weekend of November. {Ah, the best laid plans o' mice and men, oft go astray!!} Many of my friends were speaking at a ladies event at our church that Saturday (the 5th), and my parents had some important plans that first weekend that I didn't want them to feel torn about if I had Gabe before the 6th.  However, things started getting into motion long before the 6th...

On the eve of his arrival, I was at our church's Wednesday night bible study along with the rest of our tiny family of 3, feeling a little rushed and out of breath as I usually am after the mad dash it takes to get everyone to church.  My belly was tightening a little bit in class and I figured it was just Braxton Hicks from all the movement it took to get there. I even jokingly told someone my water might break there and it'd be sort of awkward having this stream of liquid go down my pants (I am one for poise & grace regarding delicate matters, that's for sure!)  Awk-ward!  After class was over I was speaking with some of my dear birthing friends, Juline & Jenny B. I asked Juline, who is a birth assistant at the birth center where Mia was born, to feel my belly.  Did she feel like it meant anything? She wasn't sure but we were all just having fun discussing the possibility of imminent labor and all that.  I had only started taking 5-W, an herbal supplement, earlier in the week. 5-W (which stands for 5 weeks) is an herbal blend that supplies nutrients supportive to the female glandular and reproductive systems and should be taken during the last five weeks of pregnancy.  It's supposed to strengthen the uterus to make labor & delivery easier.  I was not taking Evening Primrose Oil or any other late-term pregnancy supplements as some of them were contraindicated with my blood thinner.  I had also taken 5-W with Mia the last couple of weeks and looking back I believe it helped.  It is supposed to even shorten pushing time.


Regardless, we all went home that night and got settled into bed assuming the following day would be busy with continuing the food prep I had begun the day before (see this post).  As I slept that night, I awoke a few times noting some low pressure in my abdomen, like he was pushing down on my cervix.  I assumed it just meant he was dropping even more, getting further into the birth canal. I did not necessarily think it meant delivery was soon.


However, when I woke up that morning, things started to feel different. Mia was acting much more differently around me, really wanting my attention and wanting Mommy to play with her. I had skipped my normal breakfast items to instead play with her and try to be "present," only to find myself distracted by what was going on with my own body. What was I feeling? Were these waves of pressure the real deal? Were contractions settling in??


Meanwhile, Greg was getting ready for work and we were discussing what was going on, and I started noting to him that I was having a harder time staying focused. But within a span of probably 10 minutes, we went from saying, "Go ahead, go to work," to "Why don't you stay home and sign-in online here, just in case?" to "Let's call Brian & Amanda, we need to get a little day & overnight bag packed for Mia!"
I downloaded Contraction Master on my iPhone and started timing these "waves" (a hypnobirthing term, which felt appropriate at the time as they were only waves and quite tolerable).  I texted my doula, Stephanie, who happened to have a totally free day ahead of her and was quite enthusiastic about the prospect of assisting me through another birth that day.  I was still dubious that this was it, but at the same time my body was telling me things were getting underway.


I still hadn't eaten breakfast and was hardly interested in it as I was slightly fearful of throwing anything up, as I did in Mia's labor, but I was glad I had made some homemade stock the day before that was still warm in the crockpot--that at least seemed to sound soothing to my stomach. I started sipping on that while Greg got Mia ready to go over to cousin Braden's and I unloaded the dishwasher.  Yes, I did very silly things while in early labor.  I unloaded the dishwasher and tried to clean up some of the kitchen.  I called my mom (not silly), to let her know what was going on, and I took a call from Monica--I think we were talking about her pregnancy weight gain (ha!) and I told her I thought things were happening.  I even had a contraction while on the phone, and the dear that she is told me to breathe :).  I sat on the birth ball during these waves and tried to relax through and sway through them, but I could tell they were speeding up and increasing in intensity.  I wanted and felt that I needed to take a shower, so while Greg was out dropping off Mia (and quickly running through Target as we needed some last minute hospital items!), I took a shower, did my hair and even put on some makeup.  Who knew if it would last but when I went into labor with Mia, I was not prepared in that sense.  I just wanted to feel presentable (somehow knowing I had done something with myself that day gave me the feeling that I was "in control") and have one good last shower before I was in a hospital for who knows how long.  By that point in time, our doula was almost to our house and when she arrived and Greg had gotten back, it didn't take too long for her to watch me to decide we should go ahead and get to the hospital.  


I texted Lindsay to ask her to come over after we left to deal with all the soaked beans, lentils and quinoa I had sitting out, and to store the remaining chicken stock.  And to also fold my laundry.  Let's just pause here for a minute and say I have some good friends who would come over and do such a thing for me.  Like I said, I really didn't think labor would be that day!  (In an ideal world you go into labor with your house spotless, your clothes clean, folded and put away, and your freezer already stocked with all the meals you intended to make!...and your printer already loaded with paper and your birth plan printed out.)


While we were about to head out the door, Stephanie put some more broth for me in some containers so I'd be able to sip on it at the hospital, and we grabbed our bag and our birth plan, which was just printed out that morning, and started the crazy journey to Tampa General Hospital...

The very beautiful Tampa General Hospital, on Davis Island

To be continued...

Making a list & checking it twice

Spaghetti Noodle Brain: have you heard of it?

Girls have spaghetti noodle brains and guys have waffle brains.  For girls, everything's connected like a piece of spaghetti. For guys, each thing has its own separate compartment, much like a waffle. And never think for a guy that each box in the waffle is full of thoughts, because it's not!

I definitely have spaghetti noodle brain.  This is related to that, which is related to this, which means I need to do this, which means...AHH!! I'm going crazy. I have an iPhone, which often helps me with spaghetti noodle brain (I can "quickly" look something up if I'm forgetful at the store), and I also have a pen & paper at home so I can jot something down real quick if I need to. I'm a visual-verbal-kinetic person, so to remember the sensation of writing something down and then reading it really helps me stay on track.

So, now that you've taken a quick walk inside how some of my brain works, I say all that to say, I'm finally doing my freezer meal planning. Probably about 2 weeks too late, but hey, better late then never, right?

The Freezer Meal Plan

Currently I have 3 "grains/legumes" soaking: black beans, quinoa and lentils.  (In case you need a quick primer on how to soak said food items, check out Healing Naturally by Bee's cheat-sheet!)  I loved everyone's suggestions from the freezer meal suggestion post and am incorporating the recipes I already know first, and in time I think I might try yours as well.  So far a lot of my planned freezer meals are soups.  With winter coming often comes depressed immunity, so maybe I'm just psychic and am hoping my soups made with homemade broth will keep us on the up & up.  Because I'm pretty sure my sleeping won't :-\

Here's my plan, should the Lord will me to see that these recipes actually meet their fruition before bambino's born!

• Chicken Quinoa Stew
• Hamburger Barley Soup
• Black Bean Soup using "Sofrito"
• Lentil Soup
• Chicken Enchiladas (probably this recipe)

Last weekend, I already froze what we didn't eat of Wellness Mama's 5 ingredient Crockpot Chili - bean free, which was was super easy and tasty.

I'm also planning to soak great northern beans so I'll have beans ready for our White Chili recipe, and in my crockpot right now are chicken bones simmering so I'll have some more chicken stock to use in all these said recipes! (My freezer stash of chicken stock is quickly depleting).  

If I can be so productive tomorrow, I'm hoping to knock out maybe 2-3 of these recipes or at least get them started.  I accidentally picked up parsley instead of cilantro at the store so I won't be able to completely put together my sofrito just yet, but I can go ahead and chop the other veggies.  We ate that black bean soup with the sofrito last winter and it was really yummy!  Goes well with some kind of crunchy gluten free bread :D

-----

And speaking of the bambino, here's what I didn't tell you a couple of weeks ago, because it clearly meant NOTHING.

The Crazy Doctor's Appointment which nearly sent me into hysterics

I had my 35 week appointment 3 weeks ago and I had the Group Beta Strep test. This is a pretty important test because you are cultured to see if you are a carrier of GBS. If you are positive, the hospital protocol is to administer IV antibiotics during labor so hopefully you won't pass it onto your baby. Being a carrier does not necessarily mean you will pass it on to your baby or that he/she will get GBS, but it can be pretty serious if the baby gets it.  Fortunately, I passed my GBS test and was negative! I feel like I've had enough with antibiotics during my life so if I can avoid it one more time I'm quite happy. Well, while I was being tested for GBS, my doctor did an internal exam (um, hello! only 35 wks! -- was a little surprised to be honest) and told me I was already dilated about 2 cm, 50% effaced, and the baby was at the -1 station.  Her reaction really freaked me out.  She thought I would likely have the baby within the next 1-2 weeks.  As I said, I was only 35 weeks. Which meant at most, in her mind, I'd make it to 37 weeks. She then added, "Of course you could make it to your due date and then you'd be frustrated with me."

Well here I am, sitting on my heiny in my home, blogging, at 38 weeks.  And I'm not in labor.  And I have no idea how dilated I am at this point, or when the baby is coming.  But the doctor really sent us into freakout mode for a while, which was good because things needed to get done, but may have been a bit preemptive.  With Mia I never thought I would go early (and I hardly did, she was born within her 40th week).  I say it was preemptive because at 38 weeks, knowing I could totally go 2 more weeks and be just fine, I wake up every day and think, could this be it? Surely, I hope not, because I do not feel ready (must.stock.my.freezer)! And then again, other days I'm ready to get this show on the road!

The truth about labor ... and the bambino

I know, just as well as from hearing it with Mia, and from saying it to others, the baby will come when he is ready.  My chiropractor once told me some hormone between mom and baby sync up when labor is ready to start and before then there's not much you can do about it. So, I need to let things lie and just get on with my business.  The only reason I'd want him to come earlier is for health reasons, which is an entirely different subject---

This guy's growth is slowing down (he's still growing but no longer in the middle of his peer group with respect to weight), so we don't want him to fall too far down the percentile rankings.  Yet, all his other signs look good, including the amniotic fluid and his movements and breathing, heart rate, etc.  Maybe Greg & I just make small babies.  What more can we do?  I'm eating as much real food as I can stomach! ;)

Weekend Recap

And all of that to say, we had a great weekend and Halloween. Like another friend who is due any day (more so than I am), I'm glad we didn't have an October baby because it meant I got to experience one more fun weekend with Mia.  We took her to a horse farm way out in Oldsmar on Saturday and had a blast.  There was so much to do we literally couldn't do everything.  

They had plenty of farm animals to pet & feed, a hayride, "train rides," a pumpkin patch, hay to climb, pony rides, face painting, craft making, swings/playground, snakes, a tire swing...you name it, it was there.

A Zorse: offspring of a male zebra & female horse

And Mia was once again, Little Red Riding Hood for Halloween. But she figured out her costume this year, actually kept on the cape, and liked the hood.

getting ready for Kindermusik class

All prepped to "trick or treat!"

Cheesing with Braden in front of a totally decked out Halloween house

To tie this awfully long post back together, I'm still making lists, and still crossing off items. If I were to go into labor tonight, would I have everything ready? Not in my ideal world. We'd make do, though.  I'm 38 weeks, and this is Megan C., signing off.

Let's have a Nice November, shall we?

Redeeming the time...

I'm 37 weeks as of yesterday and October is almost over! I just knew September & October would fly by but I couldn't have expected it to pass this quickly.

Normally I'm not one of those DIY people who prides themselves on all that they accomplish, although in actuality I wish I was a bit more that way.  However, call it nesting or call it just getting down to business, Greg & I have been busy getting things ready in our home for baby #2, even if it still sort of resembles a train wreck around here.  (The problem is getting things out & then putting them away, it seems. A good lesson for all of us in this family!!)  Lately we've been very DIY-y around here, much thanks to...

My brother & sister-in-law who graciously took Mia off our hands on Saturday and to the zoo. She had SO much fun and the pictures they took with her were incredibly precious. Greg & I were so appreciative of the time they spent with her and how they made her feel special. She is so blessed to have local aunts & uncles who take an interest in her. Here's some of the fun they had!

Ranger Mia

Her new giraffe - she requested Allison take her picture & show her!

Looks like she had a pretty stinkin' good time.  Allison said she sang the whole way home -- not in the least surprised!


While they were busy exploring the zoo, Greg & I had a quick Starbucks date, ran by Home Depot, and then hurried home to work on hanging curtains in 2 rooms, setting up the crib bedding (again) and framing some new artwork that had just arrived.
The curtains that we put up in the bambino's room were from Ikea and as such, were "no-sew" hemming, meaning I had to iron on adhesive at the hem where I wanted it to fall, and then cut it off. Having never done such a thing before I was very nervous I'd mess it up, so I probably spent about 50% longer on that project than was really required, but they turned out pretty well!

New curtains with tie-backs

Arbor artwork from art.com, frames from Ikea

New Anthropologie knobs on dresser/changing table

artwork as it is hung

Greg meanwhile hung up a double curtain rod in our room so we could hang some gauzy, airy, almost sheer and off-white curtains that will be the base of another set of curtains (to eventually be selected and purchased).  We have sliding glass doors off of our master bedroom, and with it come those pretty much unattractive vertical blinds, and the gauzy curtains soften up the look of the room quite a bit, while adding a touch of privacy.  Sorry, no pictures of that yet!

Since then, most of my time has been spent trying to enjoy these last days with Mia before everything changes again.
Last Friday, after my 36 week dr's appointment, we spent the morning with Miss Ashley & Amelia, Mia's little buddy. We completed a fall art project that included finger painting paper, stenciling out leaves, and creating a fall wreath.  Mia had a blast painting and running around with Amelia, and as always I loved spending time with Ashley. She is such a warm hostess and makes amazing cider!

Other than that, we've spent much more time outside as the weather has been beautiful...a slight breeze and sun, and Mia & I have taken our fair share of excursions outside of the house.
One morning to Wiregrass, another morning to the library, a stop at Walgreens (oh so fun), and yesterday, we redeemed a Groupon at a local German restaurant! Not your typical lunchtime destination for a mom & a 2 year old, but it was quite an experience and totally worth repeating.  I'm trying to make these days memorable ... not only for myself but also for Mia.  I hope she doesn't get cabin fever after the baby is born but there will only be so much that can be done initially. And since I'm all sentimental I've been snapping as many pictures as possible!

Train ride at Wiregrass - Ticket: $3

Sharing a lemonade from pretzel stand: $1.69

Lunch at Mr. Dunderbak's with Mommy: $10 (for Groupon) + $4 for tip

they have excellent homemade "pommel frites"

hopefully the only picture of Mia at a bar you'll ever see! ;)

 Enjoying a snack & my chai frap at Starbucks: $5.97

Running through the   "fields" of our front yard and picking "flowers": priceless

Greg would probably like everyone to know that on the day this picture was taken,
the yard was later mowed.
We do not live in the wilderness :D

I'm thankful we've come this far and have all the mixed emotions that come with being so close to the end.  I have my 37 week appointment tomorrow where all the normal stuff will be done plus another biophysical profile and a growth scan.  The bambino's looked pretty good thus far, and despite my fundal measurements not vastly increasing at this point, the amniotic fluid levels look good, which mean his growth is less likely in jeopardy.

If there was ever anything to complain about (and I shouldn't, because it could ALWAYS be ten times worse), it's that I've switched to Heparin now instead of Lovenox, which means I have to give myself injections twice daily now.  And since the syringes don't hold the full vial of Heparin, it means I actually have to give myself 2 injections, twice daily.  Yep, that's right, you did the math correctly: 4 injections. Aren't I lucky? I'll be put back on Lovenox for 6 weeks after the baby is born, so in a way, I'd actually prefer to deliver earlier than later if it means only one shot a day.  We'll see what happens though.  Everything else is pretty stinkin' good.

Enjoying this time while it lasts!

Friday Fun ... and a full week

It's been a crazy week; can I get a witness?  Greg drove my childhood bedroom furniture down from Indiana last weekend and it's been sitting in our previous "guest suite" this week while we figure out paint colors & art work and designs and all that fun jazz.

Here is the guest room as it was "full":

Loved it while it lasted

Now it's not:

Bare & being prepped for la Chiquita

I had a doctor's appointment on Wednesday and all went well...even if my doctor sort of conveniently freaked me out by thinking we don't have much time left for this baby to cook.  I know I could sit at my current level of "progress" for weeks so I need not hype myself up, but this weekend, Greg's painting, I'm organizing clothes (hand me downs & other such things) and trying to get a grip on our house before it throws up on itself.  Or should I say, it already is.

So last night as a quick, easy and relatively cheap diversion, we went to the FCA Fall Festival and had a good time.  Cheap tickets, lots of little activities for young's, and several familiar faces.

Hayride - Mia's not sure what to think!

It sort of looks like "fall," right?  Pretend I'm not wearing shorts.  I mean, pretend I'm wearing pants & a hoodie instead.  We'll get our "fall time"...eventually!

Yesterday, Mia and I "blazed" (as much as one can blaze) through Ikea and picked up a few odds & ends and stopped by Anthropologie to pick up these cute drawer pulls.  Since she's moving out of the nursery, we need to de-girlify the room a little bit so her former Anthro knobs will be replaced by these guys.  Greg says we should eBay her old knobs but I'm not ready to let go of them just yet.  

purchased in blue & green

previously adorning the dresser in red & orange

I also ordered some artwork for the kids' room walls; hopefully I didn't make a huge mistake and if so I am instilling faith in an easy returns process.  I wish I could have everything set up STAT but it takes paint a while to dry, artwork a while to ship, and more than just a pregnant lady to hang curtains.  If I could multi-task in my sleep, I would.

This is very vintage-y but I could not pass up this little gem for the Bambino's room!

And besides that, I need to be getting ready for childbearing.  My chiropractor thinks I've dropped, and I sort of do too.  Baby's in a good position (head-down) and I hope he stays that way, so I'm trying to keep him as engaged as possible.  Squats, pelvic rocks, upright seating?  Here we go!

Speaking of the bambino, I think we have narrowed down our list of names to 2.  Mia can say both names but when we ask her which she likes better, there seems to be a clear winner.  Interesting.  It has been our stronghold name all along, but obviously the reason we're still so torn is because we really like both, regardless.  

In time, in time.  

That's it for now.  I'm going to go pick up dinner for now.  It's been one of those Saturdays and Mia is still asleep after a whole week of not napping since Monday so time is of the essence.

This is seriously how she fell asleep today.
I had to contain myself from busting out laughing when Greg fixed her blanket so she'd be able to breathe.

Peace...from the Southeast.