Friday, June 4, 2010

Mixed Messages

I think one thing that confused me before I became a mom was hearing people say things like, "You'll love being a mom; it's the best thing ever!" and then that same person off-handedly remarking that their kids were driving them nuts.  I was very confused...are you telling me that being a mom is awesome while at the same time pulling your hair out?  It wasn't until after Mia exited the womb that I understood these so-called mixed messages.

There are various times throughout my day where Mia will come up to me and snuggle, lay her head on my lap or try to "love" on me (anytime she pats something she's "loving" it).  There is also a time during the day, usually around 3:30pm, where I try to put a sleepy Mia down for a nap, and she resists.  With full-freakish-force.  It is usually about this time I say mean mommy things in my head, like, "I hate this!" (i.e., her not sleeping, not Mia!) and, "If only she would go to sleep, my life would be complete!" Usually Greg gets an onslaught of angry text messages that detail the last 30-45 minutes of frustration.  It could be only 15 minutes later that I've changed my mind--of course after deciding trying to put Mia down for a nap was a horrible idea and vowing never to do it again--and I think Mia's the sweetest, cutest thing ever.

So why do these things happen? Why do we go from love to strong irritation in a nanosecond?  I don't know for sure why, but I would say in my case I find myself strongly irritated by a situation I feel I cannot control. (But I wouldn't label myself a "control freak.") Whereas once Mia would fall asleep just by sucking on a bottle, she's much more strong-willed now and knows there are things going on outside her room or our house that may be more interesting than slowly falling to sleep in the cozy confines of her chic PotteryBarnKids crib. How dare she not love it! :-P

Have I fallen into the group that sends mixed messages?  Ohh yeah. We're way past that.  I don't enjoy doing that, spewing forth happy happy happy! and grr grr grr! but it seems it's part of the daily grind, at least for now.  So while I work on ways to adjust my mentality during the 3 o'clock hour, consider this face I wrestle with daily.

How could you not love this??

PS: I may take my cues on how to adjust my mentality from this little girl:


laura said...

I don't think this is confined to the role of motherhood, as I can hear myself doing it about pretty much everything (I LOVE BEING INDEPENDANT! I HATE BEING INDEPENDANT!), but I can see how it's especially part of it. Basically, it means your a real person with feelings! I for one, am glad you are not a robot.

Megan said...

"I love Mr. Knightly. I hate Mr. Knightly!" -Am I quoting this right??