Tuesday, June 21, 2011

On Being Thoughtful

When I was a little person (let's say 10 years old), I used to spend a lot of time by myself thinking.  This was right around when our family moved into a new house in a new neighborhood and I didn't have any friends yet.  Cue lots of self-reflective time for an already slightly analytical girl.  This was also around the time I decided to perm my hair like my best friend from elementary school (JH), which proved to be a mistake going into the 5th grade.  Thankfully, a new friend emerged (EM) and helped me muster through the beginning of the Awkward Years.
From Me & Jackson, my little brother buddy

From displaying awkwardness in its finest

Anyhoo, the whole point of this is about being thoughtful.  At the ripe young age of 10 years old, I remember taking a walk and thinking that I was a pretty thoughtful human being. I thought about how I thought about other people's feelings and how I tried to take that into consideration when dealing with someone else (metacognition, already?!) and how people have preferences and how to honor those, etc.  I was reflecting on myself and thought I did a pretty good job.  Apparently I had a lot of self-confidence at that time too...

These days, I don't have quite as much mental free time as I did when I was ten years old and subsequently, sometimes I don't find myself being as thoughtful.  Being thoughtful takes preparation and it means more than just a last minute text message that says, "Sorry I forgot, but happy birthday!!"  They say it's the thought that counts but sometimes it's also the medium.  Or the timing.  Or the wording.  Sometimes my thoughts are too late, poorly executed, or miscommunicated.

I could blame it on being pregnant, but whenever I do remember something important, or plan in advance and have a bag of cookies to give a friend when she helps me out, I register it in my mind as an act of thoughtfulness, and it spurs me on to the next one, and I feel good about being less involved in myself.  Some people are just really thoughtful, and it seems like they always have it together.  I would venture to say that they are perhaps less self-centered and more aware of the greater picture and their purpose and organized enough so they can be more prepared for unexpected events (or last minute reminders).  I want to be like that!!

How do you find yourself being thoughtful?  What aids you in this? What is the most thoughtful thing someone has done for you lately??


Rose said...

yo. i've been rather unthoughtful lately, as i've let the last push to finish this master's degree (defense is tomorrow!) plus our future move take over my thoughtfulness functions. i've recognized this in my life in several ways, especially in the blog participation aspect. so, if you will let me, i'll count reading this post as focusing on someone else today, if just for a moment.

Rose said...

p.s. the pic of you n' jackson is so cute...wee oh, wee oh!